The time has finally come. Eight days stand before me and a journey of a lifetime. My emotions are all over the place, and surprisingly, excitement is at the very bottom of the totem pole.
My excitement is there, yes. But I think my nerves, anxieties and fears are overpowering the joyful feeling of being in a different country in just one week.
For those of you who do not know yet, I will be studying abroad this fall semester in Rome, Italy. But first I will be going to Guatemala to see Edwin J <3 (perks of having an international boyfriend, you get to travel the world J) My excitement to see him is through the walls—I finally get to see my amazing boyfriend in eight days after being apart for 96. I’m smiling just typing this up.
After my week in Guatemala, I will come home for one night and then fly out to Europe the next day. I know you’re probably thinking that I’m crazy… but oh well!
Preparing for such a journey has taken me basically all three years at UIW. I’ve needed to save some money, study hard, and gain knowledge and confidence. And I know that all my hard work and dedication will be very rewarding when I’m sipping on a glass of wine in Florence.
But right in this moment, I just can’t seem to calm my nerves and make my head stop spinning in multiple directions. The phrase that has commonly come out of my mouth this past week has been: “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” I have been preparing for this moment for the past year years, why am I not excited? Why am I a nervous wreck?
Well, I’m gonna be in a foreign country for the entire semester! That’s why I’m nervously scrambling this week!
This entire summer I’ve been on a schedule, placing all my “things to do before studying abroad” in my agenda and also having to worry about all the other duties I needed to conquer before going. Some of those duties include: preparing for the Teen ACTS retreat (which was incredibly amazing and I am so proud of my younger sister Sabrina for being such a wonderful leader as a teen director), applying for scholarships, applying for graduation, making sure I have a job secured for when I come back in the spring, and spending as much time with my family as I can before I leave—oh and not to mention I had a full-time job that kept me pretty busy.
So to say the least, my summer has been crazy—but I wouldn’t have wanted it to be any other way!
Being a young adult on the ACTS retreat this past weekend has been so rewarding. The teens reminded me how important it is to rely on our community, and they keep my young. God was definitely working through them, and I think I learned more from them then they learned from me. It’s amazing how God works!
I gave a talk basically about how I’m about to graduate college and I still have no clue what I’m going to do, but that I’m totally okay with that because I trust God completely. So if that’s what I talked about, why am I freaking out so much about what’s to come in two weeks? Well… as I said in my talk, it’s because I’m going into the unknown—and that is scary.
Something I’ve learned over this past week is that even though I am distancing myself away from my friends unknowingly, they will always be there for me. And most importantly, God will always be there for me. Yes, I will be apart from the people I love the most the next four months, but not apart from God. He will be there with me at all times!!!! He will be my travel buddy through it all, and now as I’m typing this I am so excited to begin my journey! Why was I so scared? My trust is in the Lord and I know with Him I can do anything.
I was talking with my mom last night about how I was extremely nervous about this, but with her motherly feel and kind words, she told me that I will be completely okay. She said that being nervous like this is a good thing because I will be very aware of my surroundings. She made me feel 100% better. (Thanks mom for that! Love ya 🙂 )
So basically this blog post was just to write down my thoughts, let y’all know I’m going abroad, and tell you that God is my best friend… He is with me always and with Him we Conquer ALL!
p.s. Follow my study abroad blog if ya want! 😉